Ctrl-Alt-End
by jobelle516
Summary: I totally love Glee and I totally adore Blaine Anderson, his character was a life saver for Kurt. Anyhow, some scenes didn't end the way I wanted them to, so I'm doing what I like to, and writing them my way. This collection of stories will be an alternate continuation or ending to any scene from the show.
1. Ch1 Ctrl-Alt-End

_**Ownership Disclaimer:**_ Glee, nup! You might notice a significant written section from the actual scene, so ownership for that is hugely theirs. This is relevant to help set the scene for my au twist. Also, not everyone can see the telly screen, so this is done for those who like to have things read to them, and also for those who can read with a huge magnifier.  
But my imagination I do, and pov too. Strong believer in relationships being about trust and forgiveness, love and tolerance. And huge doses of reality.  
_**Thank you: **_Everyone reading all these delightful stories, esp Travelling the White Line, esp Blaine, Blaine, Blaine Devon Anderson and so many, many more.**  
**_**Music Inspiration: **_All of me – sung by Darren Criss ~ aka Blaine.

* * *

_**I**_ totally adore Blaine Devon Anderson, his character was a life saver for Kurt. His progress through the series and the honey who plays him, compliment one another. Some scenes didn't end the way I wanted them to, so I'm doing what I like to, and writing them my way.  
_**This**_ collection of stories will be an alternate continuation or ending to any scene from the show.

* * *

**~ Ctrl-Alt-End ~ **

The performance classroom is on the third floor, the sun is shining through the curtain-less windows, the air should be warm but it's actually quite cool.

Blaine counts his steps, moving to his right and stops before the end of the stage, he counts and moves to the left, stopping before stepping over the edge.

"Blaine, come. I bought baby cakes." June Dalloway places the sack of pastries on the table, sits, opens a notebook and proceeds to write. "What were you doing up there?" she asks.

As he pulls out the nutritious goodies, "Oh I like to measure the stage and see how many paces I have in each direction, and that way if I decide to freestyle I won't fall on to my ass in to the crowd." He looks to her as she smiles at the idea of him doing just that. "It wouldn't be that funny."

"You know success depends on three things. It depends on talent, hard work and luck. And if you have the first two you don't have to worry about the third." She keeps eye contact with him while talking, as he mixes up his dessert.

"Oh who said that?"

"Me." She giggles, "Just now."

They discuss seating arrangements and other incidentals for the upcoming show case.

Blaine braces himself, building up courage and finds a break in her constant collection of words and motherly attitude. "June, I've been carrying around this lie that Kurt's going to be in the showcase. Can we just give him one song."

"I said no. …" Other humiliating barbed words come forth from her, "I can not jeopardise my track record because your friend doesn't like to hear bad news."

"Kurt is amazing, he's incredible." June cuts him off with her closed mind, she stands and puts a hand under his chin.

An uncomfortable moment that lasts a split second, she then taps his cheek like she's correcting a child. "No."

As she walks out, his cheeks burn, the tap felt more like a slap. A slap to his ego, that stung, as too did the insult to his manhood and disrespect as an adult sinks in.

He gets up and walks to the piano, his fingers trickling over the keys as he walks by to the window.

The inspiration of a song coming slowly to mind. Standing at the class window, he looks down on the students below. He spots Kurt walking with some other students, they're laughing at Kurt at something he's saying. Something definitely said to provoke laughter, may be a smart ass word or two.

"_What will I do without your smart mouth?"_ Blaine turns away from the window and makes for the piano.

He tinkles with the keys, looking for the right notes to mix with. _"Drawing me in and you kicking me out."_

"_You got my head spinning, no kidding, I can't pin you down." _His mind throws to their morning endeavours, unable to get a straight answer from Kurt on their wedding date. "_What's going on in that beautiful mind? I'm on your magical mystery ride, and I'm so dizzy, don't know what hit me, but I'll be alright."_

Some more tinkering of the keys, blending and bouncing off the carefully chosen furniture and sound walls of the classroom. _" 'cause all of me, loves all of you, love your curves and all your edges all your perfect imperfections."_

At this point Kurt puts his head around the doorway, Blaine hasn't seen him just yet. He carefully walks in and listens to soulful music and melody.

" '_cause all of me, loves all of you, love your curves and all your edges, all your perfect imperfections_," Blaine looks up, _" 'cause I give you all of me, and you give me all of you. ohhh." _He stops at this point, their eyes meeting. Blaine's wet with emotion, Kurt's puzzled but full of love just the same.

"That was truly moving. I …." He holds up a paper bag. "bought you some lunch, but I see you've already eaten dessert." Somewhat perplexed, "I thought we were going to eat together this week?" Blaine looks down.

"Oh, um June bought this for me, sorry I kind of forgot. You know how she is." Blaine hears a significant rise of emotion in Kurt's breath.

"Yes, I know how she is. Especially with her new 'star'." He puts the bag on the table. "That was nice, are you going to put that in the showcase?"

Looking at the keys, Blaine blurts out. "June doesn't want you in the showcase, she never did." Unable to lift his eyes and see Kurt's reaction, he bites his lip hoping avoidance will somehow help.

"Oh," Kurt holds his hands as still as can be, breathes in and tries to calmly process this information. "So you've been lying to me this whole time? Look at me Blaine."

He lifts his eyes, but still not directly to Kurt's, "I thought if I could convince her, then they wouldn't be lies anymore."

~ _marker ~_

"The old me would throw a fit and send this food flying, please look at me?" He asks and Blaine raises his eyes to meet Kurt's.

Kurt walks around the piano and sits leg either side of the seat and pulls Blaine in for a hug. "I wish you hadn't felt the need for any of that. You can't make everything possible by being so adorable. You might think the world revolves around you, and you can make all things possible."

He lifts Blaine's chin up, "But it doesn't and you can't. So we'll accept I'm not in this showcase with you, but I'll be in the audience supporting you. This is your turn to shine, independently of me."

A wipe of each eye with a soft tissue, a soft kiss to soothe.

Blaine swaps their arms of embrace, "Well you better be prepared, because you will be singing with me in the showcase. I just have to figure out which and how many songs."

They get up from the seat, Blaine carefully closing the piano.

~ _rewind ~_

Kurt takes a step back, looks at the food remnants June lavished on his fiancé and compares to the lunch he'd bought in.

In one quick move Kurt hits the lunch bag and sends it flying to the other side of the room, and yells, "You lied to me!" Hands to his temples, "Despite our many conversations about this, you still lied to me!"

"Kurt please?"

"Don't 'Kurt please' me? How am I to trust you if you keep lying to me?" He turns to leave.

He takes two steps but can't go any further, Blaine's hands are around his stomach holding him in place. "Don't leave me like this." Turning him to face around, Blaine has him held by his shoulders now, firmly and forcefully.

Kurt's turn to refuse looking in to his eyes. "Don't you see how my trust levels are minimised each time you do these things?"

Blaine pulls him in for a tighter hug, pulling his face to his chest. "Yes, and I'm sorry. It got so out of my control so quickly."

Feeling emotionally beaten Kurt's body slumps into Blaine's embrace. "I don't know how much more of these unnecessary actions of yours I can take. It's so humiliating. I didn't need for you to pretend to get me in to things. I can do things myself, I don't need you to try and lift me up higher than I can, naturally."

Blaine walks him over to the bay window. "That's part of my problem. I wanted you to need me, like you did when we were in the Warblers."

Still not willing to unravel from the emotional sook he's soaking up all he can, Kurt continues, "You have to stop trying to save me Blaine. Let me get my own roles and stop being my hero."

Circle rubs on his upper back and carefully placed pecks on his neck, Kurt eventually opens up and Blaine whispers in his ear, "You will sing with me in the showcase." A nip of his earlobe. "And I will be your knight in shining armour, always."

Kurt blushes and breathes in deeply, he turns and takes a more loving kiss from his fiancé. "You will always be my knight in shining armour." He snuggles in to Blaine's lap, "But how are you going to get me permission to sing, if she said no?"

"Leave that to me."

_~ rewind ~_

Kurt stands with his mouth open in disbelief. "Why would you do that?"

"I just wanted for you to be performing with me, up there. I'm overwhelmed to be doing this on my own."

"But you've done heaps of things on your own. You've been the lead singer of the Warblers for so long, and you've had single performances in the New Directions."

"This would have been completely on my own though, I've never had that."

"Blaine, are you, are you nervous?"

Blaine blushes, his cheeks are burning hot. "I've never been nervous before, I suppose that I am very nervous Kurt."

"So you add to that mix something that is totally humiliating to me."

They stand looking into one another's eyes, with a _huge_ piano between them.

"Well, there's only one thing I think that can be done about this." Kurt chews his bottom lip before continuing.

"What's that?" Blaine's eye lashes fluttering and his top lip being drawn in.

"We'll have to show her how wrong she is then."

"How?"

"You choose a song and sneak me in to it."

Blaine's face drops at the suggestion, it seems as dangerous as pinching the spotlight from Rachel, but it also seems very enticing.

He walks around the piano to Kurt, and grabs his hands. He lifts them and kisses the engagement ring, looks to him and whispers "Okay."

They smile wide at one another, feeling like little kids about to get caught with their hand in the cookie jar.

"How many days until this showcase?" asks Kurt.

"Tomorrow night." States Blaine. "Do you want to go get some dinner right now?"

"No." says Kurt. "I want to go to you place, and then we'll practice a song or two."

"Oh!"

"Oh indeed."


	2. Ch2 Conception, Pregnancy, Delivery ?

_**Ownership Disclaimer:**_ Glee, nup! You might notice a significant written section from the actual scene, so ownership for that is hugely theirs. This is relevant to help set the scene for my au twist. Also, not everyone can see the telly screen, so this is done for those who like to have things read to them, and also for those who can read with a huge magnifier.  
But my imagination I do, and pov too. Strong believer in relationships being about trust and forgiveness, love and tolerance. And huge doses of reality.  
_**Thank you:**_Everyone reading all these delightful stories, esp Travelling the White Line, esp Blaine, Blaine, Blaine Devon Anderson and so many, many more.**  
**_**Appreciation: **_Marla's Lost for such a beautiful review. Faves and followers ~ the pressing of those buttons are a terrific review too._**  
Music Inspiration:**_All of me – sung by Darren Criss ~ aka Blaine.

* * *

_**I**_ totally adore Blaine Devon Anderson, his character was a life saver for Kurt. His progress through the series and the honey who plays him, compliment one another. Some scenes didn't end the way I wanted them to, so I'm doing what I like to, and writing them my way.  
_**This**_ collection of stories will be an alternate continuation or ending to any scene from the show.

* * *

**~ Ctrl-Alt-End ~ **

_**Ch2 ~ Conception, Pregnancy, Delivery ?**_

Quinn sits at the head of the Celibacy club table, Santana and one other Cheerio member to her right. On her left is Brittany and three other Cheerio members.

Far on the other side of the room a new recruit, Rachel Berry.

Quinn hits the gavel down three times, "The Celibacy club is now in session. Thanks to School rule that says we have to let anyone join the club, we're welcoming a new member with us this week, Rachel Whatshername."

"Where are all the boys?" asks Rachel.

"Down the hall. First half hour we separate, then we come together to share our faith."

_And down the hall:_

Finn twirls a football in the air, thinking aloud how he only joined celibacy club to get in to Quinn's pants. But he likes that the boys can get together and talk about sexual issues, like Jacob Israel considering suicide because of his sexual frustrations from being bombarded with provocative images and temptations.

_Up the hall:_

The girls continue their meeting talking about teasing the boys and not pleasing their boyfriends.

_Down the hall:_

The boys continue their meeting talking about making out and grinding but not allowing complete fulfilment and keeping 'that' problem at bay. For Finn, what works for him is to remember when he drove into a public servant and nearly killed him. The glass smashed everywhere, the windscreen needed replacing and the person had to go to hospital. The best thing though, is that since, Finn doesn't ejaculate too soon. His Mum screaming in his ears is just the noise required to prevent any grandchildren ideas.

_Up the hall:_

_~ marker ~_

The two gender classes now come together, they prepare helium balloons to play 'don't get pregnant' games. They hold a balloon between them and apply sufficient pressure so as to entice, but if the balloon pops then that would indicate getting pregnant and it makes the Angels cry.

Breaking from the group, Rachel changes the mood in the room. "You know what, this is a joke?" She stands away from Jacob and looks at the others glaring at her. "I'll tell you something else too, a dirty little secret. The girls like the idea of sex as much as the boys."

_~ rewind ~_

The two gender classes now come together. The boys sit on the opposite side of the meeting tables. The two captains having made the tables one huge round circle.

Finn and Quinn sit side by side. Everyone have their hands joined one to the other.

Finn starts, "Thank you Lord that we can all join together and discuss this difficulty." They all say Amen, open their eyes and let go of the group holding of hands.

Quinn continues, "By keeping ourselves busy and not allowing more than our hands to hold, we are certain to keep our Celibacy rules. Finn could you share with us what you boys do to avoid temptation?"

He stands and picks up some papers, "Ladies, boys. Well we're all really men now. Other than our school work, we have many physical activities and hobbies that will help keep some of us from temptation. On the list just created today we have written some activities coming up such as sports until Thursday night. On Friday there is a men's cooking class at the community centre. The young men attending that will also be writing in their planners thoughts and issues they find enticing. With this list it is hoped that you ladies will be able to assist by next week helping to prevent such temptations."

There's a significant rumble of complaint between the ladies. Quinn pipes up, "Pardon Finn, are you saying that we do things intentionally and that some of this is our fault?"

"No not quite. Only that we're human and many of us are attracted to you ladies." A clearing of someone's throat is heard at the back of the men. "Oh, sorry, and we need to accommodate for the gay group too." Finn goes quite red in the face, "Quinn your turn to let us know what you ladies will be doing to avoid temptation."

"Thank you Finn. This week we will be having a hand sewing competition, which we've been asked to make a basket full of bow ties. On Friday night we'll be having a candle and scents demonstration. This week in particular we'll be studying the organic nature of raspberry." She puts her papers down and looks at the room of men, "Us ladies, have a request of you men. We're asking that you use underarm deodorants and shower more, please? Some ladies find your natural 'man scent' attractive and difficult."

With both captains seated, the end of the meeting bell chimes and Quinn indicates to the person for the closing of the meeting to take her turn.

"This meeting has been very productive. Until the next meeting we are all to think about different types of contraception, used not only to prevent pregnancy but also to prevent sexually transmitted diseases."

"Thank you Rachel, as a new member I hope this hasn't been too overwhelming for you?"

Rachel sits, taken aback by Quinn's politeness. "No, no it was fine, thank you."

Finn stands and bangs the gavel down, "This meeting is now complete and will resume next week, same time schedule."

The group get up, push chairs under the table, mix and mingle and leave.

Rachel calls out to Kurt, "Kurt? Wait up. Why are you and Brittany here?"

He stops walking, whispers in Brittany's ear and she goes on to catch up with Santana. Turning to Rachel, "What do you mean why was I and Brittany doing here? Same reason you are, to learn how to resist temptation."

"Oh I just thought with being gay that you wouldn't be tempted to having sex and the chances of getting someone pregnant is pretty non existing."

"Rachel, you and others at this somewhat homo-phobic school should recognize that celibacy is about avoiding promiscuity and not just avoiding reproduction and transmission of diseases. It's about respectability Rachel."

"I have two gay dads so I'm already aware of …."

_~ before next weeks meeting ~_

"Hey Quinn wait up?" Finn calls to her, she closes her locker and walks off ignoring him completely. He runs after her and catches up. "Hey what's with the silent treatment."

She has her back to the locker, looks up at his adorable trusting eyes and releases her pent up emotions. "I'm pregnant."

His eyes go wide, his mind fogs up and he can hear her saying something but can't quite make it all out.

"But how?"

"The hot tub the other week."

"But we had our pants on."

_~ marker ~_

"The water was hot, and that helps the sperm swim faster." Quinn starts to cry more, Finn wraps his arms around her. "I was going to get out of this town, I was happy with where my life was going to go."

Finn joins her pessimism, "I don't want to be stuck in this town as a Lima Loser, with a wife and kid on the side. I had plans for my life too."

Together, they both see their education and life as was expected to now be an absolute mess.

_~ rewind ~_

"It doesn't matter how it happened, what matters is that I'm pregnant."

"Are you going to get an abortion?" Hoping she'll say yes, but until he hears the words he still can't believe that he's the father.

"I've been in shock for the last few days. So I haven't made up my mind yet. I don't think this is really a discussion to have in the hallway of school, do you think we could talk about this tomorrow night? I've made us an appointment with the community health nurse."

"Yeah sure, that seems a better idea. Let's go to class."

The rest of the day progresses, she avoids eye contact with most of her class mates, she sits out of cheerio practice. In Glee rehearsals she watches Rachel intently and imagines how she'd never be in this situation, with being a frigid player.

Finn goes through the rest of the day feeling stung, he tries to listen to Rachel but notices more how her voice really aggravates at all the wrong places in his being. Hoping now that he hasn't got her pregnant too, with having just shared a kiss, but that might be sufficient because the sex ed classes he had attended turned out to be incorrect.

The school parking lot empties as the cars leave, one car remains, Quinn's. Finn tucks the hair behind her ear, kisses the back of her hand and opens the door for her. "I'll not be at school tomorrow Quinn, I'm going to take the day off. Can you pick me up for the meeting or will I pick you up, or do you want to just meet me there?"

"It's fine Finn. I'll pick you up. I'm also not going to school tomorrow. I'm going to spend the day looking through my family library and soaking up my home atmosphere. After lunch I'll visit the Church Pastor's wife and pray for guidance from God."

She's buckled up in the car now, he shuts the door and starts the long walk to his home, wishing he hadn't missed the bus or other lifts from others. But right now, he needs to distance himself from Quinn, he's not totally dumb, he's very certain he's not the Dad, but he'll be there for her until she pushes him away.

_~ in the morning ~_

Quinn wakes refreshed and very hungry. Her Mum and Dad go about their morning ritual and leave, not noticing she hasn't gone about her normal school day beginning.

After they leave her, she makes her way to the family library. It's a room that is full of books from floor to ceiling, and has the feeling of stepping back centuries in time. With the doors closed, it's impossible to note which time line you're in.

She picks a science history book and sits on a chair by the fireplace. This is a favourite book of hers, one that inspires women of her family. It is a reminder that females can do many things, when given the opportunity and support system in place, irrespective of being pregnant or having any physical abnormality.

Her eyes drift to a slumber and fanciful thoughts of playing family with Finn and their little cherub colour her mind. A huge cloud in the form of Puck moves over her imaginary sky.

Her eyes open wide and she sits and sobers up, knowing the real father of this child that she carries, will most likely have something significant to say, when he learns of her predicament. Therefore the idea of a termination sounds reasonable.

Eventually she gets ready for her meeting with the Pastor's wife.

She pulls the handbrake on, turns off the engine, unclips and makes her way to the front door. The idea of being a Pastor's wife being such a romantic notion, until she opens the front door and sees the welcoming calamity of a not so perfect life.

"Hi Quinn, come on in."

"Hi, thank you."

She makes her way to the sitting room and waits for the trusted female ears. Next to her Mum, this is the lady Quinn trusts the most.

She watches her shut the door behind her, and makes her way to join Quinn alongside the fireplace.

"Okay, now Quinn. Here is a list of all your options." The Pastor's wife opens a folder for her and gives it to her.

In front of Quinn is a detailed list of so many options.

Have the baby and give it up for open adoption, or give it up for a closed adoption.

Have an abortion, at the appropriate timing a list of different abortion techiques are listed.

Have the baby, keep it and plan life around the little treasure. This avenue includes where to live and baby minding assistance whilst she's in school.

Have the baby, keep it and plan life around the little treasure, but drop out of school. As Quinn looks at this scenario, the Pastor's wife speaks up, "That idea is not one I want you to think of."

Quinn looks up with questions in her eyes. The Pastor's wife continues, "No one would agree that giving up your education is in any plan. It is possible to do your schooling."

"But everyone will stare and ridicule me."

"That'd happen if you crashed your car and ended up in a wheel chair. The point is that you have every reasonable right to finish your studies, regardless of having a child or not."

"Okay, not finishing studies is not an option then." A huge smile crosses Quinn's face. "I'm really enjoying my studies, especially the art classes. And I've only got three more years till I graduate."

"Exactly, no matter what your studies results to date, you have to continue on. Failure, from quitting, is not an option."

"My Grammy always said that if I'm going to fail, it needs to be from hard work and not from quitting."

"That's my girl. Now what of the other options?"

Quinn sighs heavily, closes the folder and clasps her hands. Having put the folder down, she leans forward and rests on her knees.

"The challenge will be how my Mother and Father will react, and … I …. ummmm."

"Open up Quinn, what is it?"

"It's the father of the child, he umm, he doesn't know yet." Her voice starts to break from tears. "And my boyfriend thinks he's the father."

"Oh!"

"Yes, oh!"

"Well, we have some serious praying to do, and you have some serious thinking to do."

The two ladies look at one another. One with years of experience and wisdom, the other beginning out having made her own collection of errors.

The Pastor's wife clears her throat, and speaks carefully. "This little one, that you have inside of you, has happened because of a mistake. But what you need to consider is, which decision can you live with? Can you provide a solution that you can live with? Can you forgive yourself of one choice more than the others?"

The two ladies spend quiet prayer time together, they share cups of tea and an afternoon pastry.

The older lady takes Quinn's hands, and steady's her from crying. "No matter what happens, I'll be here for you and Quinn, God loves you no matter what your decision."

"Are you sure?"

"You are very fortunate to have so many choices, to such a predicament. There are many parts of our country where the woman is completely limited to one solution only. And there are many countries where this predicament results from rape, and again the woman's choice is limited. You, are very fortunate that you have technology and other circumstances going for you, and you still get to have an education."

Quinn's mobile phone vibrates and she looks at it. "It's Finn, he wanted me to pick him up. He said he'd come to the community nurse meeting with me."

"Quinn, you owe him the respect of being told the truth, from you. If he hears it from someone else, that will seriously affect his growth and respect for you. I know it will be difficult, but honest respect now, is a better choice from you. You should also consider the same respect for your parents. I think you'll be surprised how coming clean and honesty encourages respect and lessens shock."

"Thank you." Quinn stands, they hug and she's escorted to her car. "I'll see you tomorrow with my answer."

A sisterly kiss on her cheek, she gets in, belts up and makes her way to pick Finn up.

Quinn waits for Finn in his driveway, she receives a message from Puck, while she waits. A momentary image of her, the child and two fathers flits through her scenario hopes.

Finn hops in the car, he clips up and sits, visibly shaking. "Finn, it's going to be okay." She reassures him.

"Quinn, …" he starts and isn't sure if he should mention this thing on his mind. "I trust you, and know what I know, but I really don't see how it's possible you got pregnant from what we did."

"When we get to the community health nurse, I'll ask her to explain it. But at this stage, I can't think of another way it could have happened."

She turns the music up a little louder and they drive, the rest of the trip is spent in quiet between them.

They drive passed different family scenarios. Single children of different ages, with different aged carers. Well, Quinn puts the scenarios together of what they might be. For all good purposes, none of them might be related at all.

One scenario comes strongly to the fore, one of a woman who can't have a child of her own. And this woman could probably give this child, that she carries, a better life than Quinn hopes she could give her or him, just now.

In her heart, Quinn doesn't think she could end the little sweetie's life just now, not without lots of regret. Not when she knows that some other person could probably give her or him a better life than nothing.

Having looked at all the pamphlets dealing with the abortion idea, it's a subject close to everyone's raw nerves, and if any of her friends were to choose that path, Quinn knows she'd support and be there for them. But for her predicament right now, although she's pro-choice, she wants to see this child's smile one day and hear it's laughter too.

Already, while she's driving along, she's beginning to realize which scenario she wants to choose.

She drives with Finn, toward a solution. The most difficult scenario now, is hoping to gain Finn's respect and forgiveness.

It was wrong what her and Puck did, if she could undo it she would, but she can't undo it. What she can do, is think clearer and take responsibility for her own choices.

She parks the car, they exit. Finn waits for her, she reaches out and takes his outstretched hand.

"Finn, it's going to be okay."

"Yeah, I think it's going to be okay too."

The year started out with her feeling like a growing young lady, and has progressed to her becoming a woman.

Today the sun will set with her self respect intact. And may be, the year will end, with her being a Mum.


	3. Ch3 Zero Tolerance ?

_**Ownership Disclaimer:**_ Glee, nup! But my imagination I do, and pov too. You might notice a significant written section from the actual scene, so ownership for that is hugely theirs. This is relevant to help set the scene for my au twist. Also, not everyone can see the telly screen, so this is done for those who like to have things read to them, and also for those who can read with a huge magnifier.  
Strong believer in relationships being about trust and forgiveness, love and tolerance. And huge doses of reality.  
_**Thank you: **_Everyone in my merry old supporting land of Oz.  
_**Appreciation: **_Reviewers, faves and followers ~ the pressing of those buttons are awesome._**  
Music Inspiration: **_Somewhere Only We Know ~ sung by Darren Criss ~ aka Blaine.

* * *

_**I**_ totally adore Blaine Devon Anderson, his character was a life saver for Kurt. His progress through the series and the honey who plays him, compliment one another. Some scenes didn't end the way I wanted them to, so I'm doing what I like to, and writing them my way.  
_**This**_ is a collection of stories that will be an alternate continuation or ending to any scene from the show.  
_**TRIGGER WARNING: **_This story has a significant amount of physical and psychology violence. { aka bullying, assault and mention of the horrid slushie }

* * *

**~ Ctrl-Alt-End ~ **

_**Ch3 ~ Zero Tolerance ?**_

Blaine says for Kurt to call him out, confront him. Staring at the photo of Blaine, inside his locker door, Kurt lifts his chin up and vows to do just that, next opportunity he can, Kurt's going to stand up to Karofsky or Azimio, whoever.

He didn't have to wait too long, he could hear the jocks around the next corridor. Mr Schue shared a banter with them and let them know Kurt was nearby. _Damn that teacher and his stupid rose coloured glasses._

_~ weeks later ~_

The accused prisoner is led in to the dock. His shackles heavy, holding his arms down at his waist and attached to the chains on his legs. They make him drag his feet, the orange outfit so totally _not_ his normal Alexander McQueen pyjamas. He stands, like everyone else and watches the presiding Judge take his place.

The State's Attorney looking every bit like the father of Sebastian Smythe. Today it makes no difference that Kurt only-sort-of-kind-of-knows about Sebastian, the Judge and crimes stand alone, independent.

The Judge bangs his gavel and the Clerk stands to speak. "All be seated, this court is now in session." The court audience mumble dying conversations, words of support are whispered.

Kurt waves, smiles and mouths thanks yous to Rachel, Finn, Puck, Mercedes, _heck_ all the Glee club are there from his school. Sitting behind them are Blaine and one or two Warblers, called as witnesses. Blaine's father, Michael Anderson, speaks to Kurt's attorney, nods and smiles to Kurt. Kurt blushes but nods respectfully back.

On the other side of the court the victim's family are seated and huddled, the mothers occasionally glaring Kurt down but as they're met with a determined look from Kurt they quickly turn away.

The Judge's voice is authoritative, deep and nothing like his brother, Principal Figgins. "Will the accused stand." An order not a request. "For the charges brought against you, how do you plead?"

Kurt answers, "Not guilty your Honor." Cries of disbelief from the victim's relatives are heard.

He holds his chin in determined resolve, "Self defence your Honor." Further uproar of protests filter through being heard. The Judge bangs his gavel again. "Quiet! I will have quiet in this court."

Kurt looks to Blaine, their eyes locking. Sympathy and support from Blaine and courage and conviction from Kurt. "Provocation your Honor."

Kurt sits back down and pushes his back against the seat. The rest of the pre-hearing is a blur to him.

The victim's family scream, wail, shout and yell profanities. The remaining men of McKinley shield the women from the abuse, and hold Santana and Rachel back from lunging at the Bailiff as he escorts Kurt from the docks.

Suddenly Kurt realizes that not only had his life changed dramatically when Karofsky and co started their bullying, but standing up for himself had also changed his path and destiny.

The trial dates come and go, the witnesses called, listened to, questioned, cross examined and noted. Nothing is going to change what happened, nothing will change the reality of what Kurt knew happened. Nothing can change the scientific evidence, either.

He'd been looking straight at his locker, he saw Karofsky round the corner and approach him.

He held his breath thinking Karofsky was going to walk by, and yet expected to be whammed in to the lockers just the same.

As he felt Karofsky ghost passed him, he let out his breath, thankful that he had escaped yet another physical assault.

However, no sooner had he gone to take in the next breath, he was smashed in to the lockers. He allowed himself to slowly fall downward, but as soon as he heard that snicker, that humiliating humour of satisfaction from Karofsky, he sprung up and turned.

"HEY!" He yelled at him, Karofsky continued on, ignoring him. He watched Karofsky round the corridor bend.

"I'M TALKING TO YOU!" Kurt slammed his locker shut, anger and a volcanic energy brimming up from his gut and chest, bubbling in his ears and burning his eyes.

He was fuming. Years of being bullied and abused would finish today.

He marched toward where Karofsky went, pushing through students walking the other way.

"Hey Kurt." Mercedes called, but he didn't hear or see her.

He followed down to the change rooms, Karofsky firmly in his mind. He ignored complaints of those he pushed aside, oblivious of who they were, and one was Miss Pillsbury.

Visions of bullying and abuse running through his memory as he proceeded to confront Karofsky, call him out.

Karofsky had taken his wedding doll couple, pushed his finger hard in to Kurt's chest, he instilled horror in to Kurt. Kurt had told him he didn't want him anywhere near him. Shuddering with fear he let Mr Schue escort him to Principal Sylvester's office.

She knew of being bullied, she and her sister, when growing up, had been targeted too. The only comfort this Principal would do, would be to assign the nickname of Porcelaine and be there if Kurt called for her.

Rachel, Brittany, Quinn and Tina discussed the options of assisting him, but fighting fire with fire wasn't in their cards of what to do. Kurt couldn't handle the idea of hiding behind a girl's skirt for support, if anything was going to be done, he was going to do it.

Kurt heard that there'd been a meeting with Karofsky's father, but nothing had changed.

The teasing from a distance, hand bending, kisses being blown, hitting his fist in to his hand, all these things continued. Words of abuse stuck on his locker door and having balls of paper thrown at him, nothing had changed.

Kurt wasn't the only one to get a slushie thrown over him either. His clothes were getting ruined and the last slushie had been inhaled, he could feel something was actually in his lungs now. This wasn't just psychological bullying, this was physical assault.

And no-one was doing anything about it. If this were happening at Burt's work, there'd have been a law suit in place. If this were done to an a-lister celebrity, the staff of the President or the Royal family, something significant would be being done.

But Kurt is just a student, a glee student, just a low income nobody. And he's gay, so there's another excuse for the authorities ignoring the real human rights being abused scenario.

All the good work, encouraging vibes from their studies of art classes and psychology were being over ridden by the reality of what was happening and apparently being ignored.

As Rachel had said, a certain amount of force was going to be necessary to stand up to Karofsky and his ghouls. Not just to fight for its sake, but to retaliate and prevent something worse coming.

Something worse? What could be worse than what he'd been suffering so far. Fiddling with the food on his plate, stirring the umpteenth drink, trying to force nutrition down, he would stare and his mind would blur of what worse could ever happen.

He loved his studies, friends and had been looking forward to New York with Rachel. But lately, all he could think of was avoiding Karofsky and co. The bile in his stomach would rise and fall, making him want to punch himself to get better.

But as Blaine spoke, Kurt could feel a sense of true honest blanket of confidence being shared. He would confront him, he would call him out.

When Mercedes stood with her poster demanding potato tots, when she screamed with the others demanding the food that her parents had paid for, the thrill of standing up for your rights made the hair on the back of his neck stand up.

From the thrill of that to the smile on Blaine's face, Kurt was coming in to his own strong self.

He'd been working weights in his room. Soon enough he forced himself to eat correctly and changed his sleeping pattern. He didn't quite know how, but somehow Karofsky was going to regret hassling him.

That day finally arrived, it started out sunny and warm, it progressed to a cold, damp nightmare.

Humiliation from Mr Schue had already started the pushing of Kurt Elizabeth Hummel going over the edge.

After three whams in the day Kurt yelled, "WHAT … IS YOUR PROBLEM?"

Karofsky came back with, "You talking back to me. You want a piece of the fury?"

"What is the fury?" Eyeballing him was difficult and he could feel the shamed embarrassment of confrontation burning his cheeks, but he proceeded."

"It's what I name my fists." The spit from Karofsky hitting his face, he wiped it while looking that aggressive face front on.

"Well with that level of creativity, you could easily become an assistant manager at a rendorine plant."

"I don't know what that is, but if I find out it's bad, the fury's going to find you." And with that pathetic statement Karofsky pushed him one more time. Falling to his arse, his yellow boots sliding in front, again no one did anything.

Kurt drew on his show of support from the Warblers, to Blaine. Their explanation of zero tolerance reverberating in his ears.

"I'M TALKING TO YOU!" Kurt yelled at him.

He seemed to ignore Kurt and pulled out his joggers, "Girls change rooms are next door."

"What is your problem?" Kurt said, bringing his voice down a notch.

"Excuse me?" Karofsky replies.

"What are you so scared of?" Kurt yells in to him.

"Besides you sneaking in to get a peek at my junk." Karofsky turns back to gather his gear.

"Oh every straight guyz nightmare, that we're all out to secretly molest and convert you. Well guess what hamhock, you're not my type."

"Is that right?" Karofsky squares his jaw, feeling rejected by girlz and gayz.

"Yeah, I don't do that chubby boys who sweat too much and are gonna be bald by the time they're thirty."

"Do not push me Hummel." Forming a fist and holding it near Kurt's head.

Kurt eyes the fist and looks back at Karofsky's determined eyes. "You gonna hit me?" He lifts his chin, throwing the red cape at the bull. "Go on. Do it."

He knows he's pushing Karofsky, but he won't be bullied anymore, and he's gonna stand up for gay guyz and girlz. "Hit me, 'cause it's not gonna change who I am. You can't punch the gay out of me anymore than I can punch the ignoramus out of you."

"Get outta my face!" Karofsky yells.

Kurt noted Karofsky flinch, so he continues. "You are nothing but a scared little boy who can't handle how extraordinarily ordinary you are."

They're standing too close for comfort, Kurt's finger waving too close to Karofsky's nose. Karofsky grabs either side of Kurt's face and smashes a kiss on his mouth.

It was instinct, it was violent and abusive, it was shocking to both Karofsky and Kurt. He lets him go, Kurt's hand immediately throwing to his face, wiping the kiss off as furiously as he can. He steps back in to the lockers behind.

Karofsky is mortified that Kurt wiped the kiss off, he punches the lockers hard, looks at his hand and sees blood beginning to trickle. "AHHHH!" He yells at Kurt. "God damn you."

He punches the lockers again and turns to walk away.

Kurt stops him with a hand on his shoulder. May be his luck has changed and Kurt will accept him after all.

He turns to Kurt. "What?"

"What? All you can say is what." Throwing his messenger bag down, "You think you can do that and get away with it, and just say what?"

Kurt pulls Karofsky back in to the centre of the room. "I'll give you what."

He stands ninja like, Karofsky smirks a laugh. "What is this?"

That's all Karofsky gets to say. Kurt starts kicking in to him, his stomach, chest and balls. This brings the monster down, Kurt straddles him and punches to his face again and again.

Despite Karofsky trying to shield his face, Kurt keeps punching wherever he sees the hands are not. He clasps his own hands up high and smashes them down in to Karofsky's chest.

Blood is suddenly spat forth on Kurt, which brings him out of his frenzy and he stops.

Momentarily stops. He stands and looks at the violent abuse he's thrust down. The whimpering mess is sobbing and pleading, "Please … stop? … I'm … so … sorry."

"Sorry, you're sorry." Kurt spits on him. "I'll show you what sorry is. Here, meet sorry one and sorry two."

Kurt then smashes his feet one after another, in turn, in to Karofsky's sides. He feels through his shoes, the ribs break. They break again and again. He huffs and puffs and feels exhaustion take over his legs.

They're spent of energy, he coughs and starts to cry himself. Crying from exhaustion, he sobers up.

Kurt doesn't notice that Karofsky isn't whimpering, isn't trying to protect himself anymore, isn't moving. He's given in.

"There, so much for your fury." He spits on Karofsky again.

There's a whimper heard, but it comes from the toilet cubicle. A sniff and Kurt lies down to see under the stall door. Feet lift up.

"I suppose I've had enough then." Kurt makes to leave the once busy and once quiet change room. "I'll see you later Karofsky."

Kurt remembers having count to nearly two hundred before the cubicle door opened. He remembers hearing the occupant sniffle and cry. He remembers watching Karofsky not moving, while he waited for the occupant to do something.

He did something, he opened the door and peeked out. Peeking to check if it's safe to come out.

"Hello Azimio."

Azimio looked to his right at Kurt, blinked and fell forward. The speed of Kurt's punch to his nose sufficient to kill him in one go.

One punch that pushed his nose back on to the necessary pressure points in to his brain.

One punch that smashed the bones that once held his eyes in.

One punch that allowed a significant burst of blood to cover Kurt's hand.

The thud to the ground was sickening, Kurt stood away from both bodies. His hands were now shaking and he rushed to the wash basin.

Frantically scrambling at the taps, eventually the water splashed out and up to his clothing. He turned the taps down and washed what he could.

He walked to the hand dryer and dried what he could. He washed his hands and face once more.

When he could see no more red, he gathered some water to drink.

"Right, well, I best get to class then." Kurt remembers picking up his bag and leaving the change room, he clearly remembers going to class, the school bell indicating the end of the school day.

He went to his locker and changed books to take home for homework.

He remembers phone calls and interviews and visits from family and friends. He remembers the same from officials, that included Blaine's father, and the hiring of an independent lawyer.

He got to meet Sebastian's father, and interest in Sebastian's home life takes a new interest for him.

Long visits from Blaine, amazing support from Blaine. Tears and apologies from Blaine.

_~ now ~_

Now he holds his assigned bed linen and prison issued clothing. He holds his permitted facial products and other accessories.

He waits for the guard to open his door, the sound of the keys in the lock very much like he's heard on the telly.

He enters his room, his new home for the next twenty years.

Sitting on his bed, the mattress definitely not like his back at home, he fishes out of his pocket a photo of Blaine. Placing it on the chest of drawers by his bed, the word 'Courage' taking a new meaning.

"Lights out in ten minutes." The guard's voice booms over the p.a., and Kurt shudders, it sounds very much like a blend of Karofsky and Azimio.

_~ fini ~_

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**_Extra author notes from a kute klaine author: Covering reply to many anonymous reviewers and my dearest Marla's Lost. : _**_Thanks a heap, but then again with a quality blend with the show writer's thanks on their behalf too._  
_***This was such a difficult subject that I've been trying to think how to express and write so nicely._  
_***So thanks to the real people in the world with getting caught and going before the mass media, being displayed like they do on their way in to and out of court._  
_***But I also wanted to give Kurt the real respect he deserved in how I think he could really have dealt with his own retaliation. Thankfully the actor for Kurt, Chris Colfer, has grown as well as God intended - therefore when it came time to write this scene, all Gleeks know that this { for Kurt } would truly be very possible._  
_*** Important to know, that there is a real possibility inhaling parts of those damn slushies, and the consequences of such does amount to slushies being considered physical assault. ** I'd appreciate a real stand up to Fox and the writer's to stop with them._  
_****Okay, coming down off my high horse. ***** Love to you all, glad I can help and blah di blah._


	4. Ch 4 Blaine Anderson's word of mouth

_**Ownership Disclaimer:**_ Glee, nup! You might notice a significant written section from the actual scene, so ownership for that is hugely theirs. This is relevant to help set the scene for my au twist. Also, not everyone can see the telly screen, so this is done for those who like to have things read to them, and also for those who can read with a huge magnifier.  
Strong believer in relationships being about trust and forgiveness, love and tolerance. And huge doses of reality.  
_**A little something again:**_ No, I don't own Glee or the songs mentioned. However, as we know, I own the mixing up of story as contained underneath. And again a true Gleek, who's watched the show, as intently as I do, will know which words and scenes are theirs, and how my words and scenes are mashed up with 'em. {har di har}  
_**Inspiration:**_ I have a copy of the Warbler's album, and it drives me nuts to not know where the song, What kind of fool, fits in with the series. SO! Hence my Ctrl Alt End chapter.  
_**Love to you all following this collection of stories.**_ This Ctrl Alt End, is 'the' most followed of all my stories. I'm really tickled pink that you enjoy, as much as I do, what appears on these pages.

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_**I**_ totally adore Blaine Devon Anderson, his character was a life saver for Kurt. His progress through the series and the honey who plays him, compliment one another. Some scenes didn't end the way I wanted them to, so I'm doing what I like to, and writing them my way.  
_**This**_ collection of stories will be an alternate continuation or ending to any scene from the show.

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**~ Ctrl alt end ~**

_**Ch4 ~ Blaine Anderson's word of mouth.**_

As Blaine carefully pulls the pictures off the inside of his locker, he can't help feeling like a total fool.

If Blaine had said nothing, then Kurt wouldn't have known anything. There was no way to link Eli to Blaine, unless his Facebook account were hacked, OR if Kurt were to do one of his threatened random checks of his account. But still he would have been in the clear, and no one would be any wiser or hurt. They'd still be together today.

Because, Kurt's not aware of Blaine's 'other' Facebook account. The one he uses to spy on Kurt, his New York life and, more importantly, the one Blaine used to fill in his achy breaky lonely heart.

Blaine shuts his locker, Sam stands waiting for an answer. Which Blaine has no want of giving. He sees Finn coming around the corner, buries his head in the box of locker paraphernalia, as if hiding from what he sees will transport him to somewhere else.

Finn grabs Sam's shoulder. "Sam you have to let Blaine do what is right for him."

Finn's touch seizes Sam's shoulder, as if icicles were imbedded. He roughly throws the big jock's hands off. "No, no Finn. This won't do. New Directions is Blaine's birth right and destiny."

"Sam that makes no sense. Blaine wasn't born to McKinley." Finn crosses his eyes and purses his lips, looking to the ceiling of the corridor with wonderment of Sam's intelligence.

"Finn, Sam don't. I feel awful enough already."

Finn waves the air and allows Sam to continue. "You've been beating yourself up for weeks, since you and Kurt broke up. But packing up and leaving school, is not going to fix anything. We have exams coming up and your education is more important than a lover's tiff."

"Lover's tiff!" Blaine puts the box on the floor, crosses his arms over his chest, squares his chin and looks his pissed off eyes into Sam's. Oh if Sam only knew how adorable Blaine finds him. When he's looking out for others, when he's taking charge of conversation and pointing out the obvious.

As Sam blabs away, his lips seem to get bigger and bigger, taking over the lower half of his face. He moves his arms around in quality animation of all that is so important. Sam turns and points to Finn, for agreement of what he's saying. Finn agrees, nods his head with a huge smile, splays his arms and claps his hands together.

At this point all the chatters and jostling from other students in the corridor suddenly stop. The air pressure holds and Blaine looks back up to Sam's eyes. "What did you say? I zoned out."

"Yeah, that was exactly what I was saying. And for what? What did you do exactly?"

The memory hurts, Blaine closes his eyes and a hot flush of deep shame takes his heart to his stomach, throwing it into a ball of yuck! Seconds later the ball of yuck comes with a burp of vile hatred of himself. He slumps to the floor. Sam and Finn look down on their friend, surprise and concern about what to do?

Finn stands as Sam crouches to his knees, in front. "Tell me what was so bad. Because I can't imagine you doing anything so bad."

His own hand tight over his mouth, eyes watering of knowing that it's better to get it out in the open. Blaine scratches at the edge of his forehead, pulls a tissue from his sleeve and wipes away tears and a runny nose.

The memory, he recites to Sam. "It was a guy I met online, it was one time." While sitting on the bed, he starts to dress. "The absolute second it was done, I regretted it. It had nothing to do with him not being who he portrayed online. It was something I can't take back, ever."

The guy in the background turns around to look at Blaine's back. "He asked me if I was okay, and I said no. He asked something else and I just had to get out of there so very quickly. I kept apologizing, but I was apologizing to Kurt. My heart and mind were racing, wanting to grab Kurt and tell him how sorry I was." He reaches for one of Sam's hands and holds it tight, hoping that through touch Sam could feel how honest he was being.

"I had to get out of there. I grabbed my jacket and just ran." In his memory Blaine runs down the stairs, "I remember thinking as I left, that I had gone to his place because it felt like Kurt was moving on with his life, ….. and I, …. I wasn't a part of it." He looks up to Eli's window, for a moment he thinks that it's Kurt's window. "I got to thinking that maybe, Kurt and I aren't meant for each other … that we aren't supposed to spend the rest of our lives together…"

He hails a taxi, it pulls up and he throws himself in the back seat. After giving the driver his address and belting up, he makes a pillow of his jumper and lowers himself down on the bench seat. The warmth of the taxi is comforting, he closes his eyes and slips a thumb in his mouth and wishes he were home. Home in Kurt's arms, where everything is right and nothing will ever change.

A lightning bolt crashes nearby, the taxi halts … Blaine stands up from the corridor floor. As he rises, he continues telling Sam and Finn. "But the horrible thing is, right after I did it, I knew that we were. "

Finn steps forward, "Blaine you have to tell Kurt that."

"What, you think I haven't told him that already? You think I haven't tried?"

"Finn, we have to get him to listen." Sam lifts the box and gives it to Blaine?

He hits his head back onto the lockers. He looks from Sam to Finn, "I cheated, on the one person that I love more than anything in this world. I hurt him." He hitches the heavy box. "I hurt him. And if it were him, having done that to me, well … it'd be a while before I could trust him again. And maybe, just maybe he's never going to forgive me."

Finn, "But if it were him and you, you'd take him back, wouldn't you? After all the explanations, and sweet words and romance fluff, you'd take Kurt back, wouldn't you?"

Sam, "Even if he doesn't, you've got to forgive yourself. You've got to stop beating yourself up about it all."

They turn and walk to the choir room.

Finn, "What's say we get you to bring your emotions out in song."

Sam, "You hurt Kurt. That wasn't cool, but to make it right, leaving school is not the answer."

Blaine, "I just want to stop feeling like I'm a bad person."

Finn, "You're not. You're one of the good guys Blaine. And we've got a whole Glee Club that agrees with us."

Sam stops them walking, turns around to Blaine and holds the top of the box. Eyes to eyes, Sam licks his own lips, Blaine blushes and Sam speaks. "Give me a day. One day, where you and I speak with your parents, and let us show you. How important and valuable you are to us, to yourself. To be the hero we all know you are." He lets go of the box and steps back. "And then, you can, decide what you really need to do. To get you back on track, but leaving school, today, is not the answer."

The three of them walk into the choir room.

_~ the school bell ringz ~_

In the safety of his bedroom, no Sam and Finn to interrupt him. Blaine sits cross legged, on top of the covers, in the middle of his bed. Notepad on a stable table, pen in one hand. The other one has his ipod shuffle, pressing play, pause, play and stop.

He listens again to the song in one go, looks at the scribbled notes, then rips the page out and puts it above the notebook. Then he starts his third love letter for today.

Dear Kurt,

I'm not meaning to plagarize, but this is what's in my heart, and someone has put together the words in the right order that equals where I need them.

Firstly, I am so very sorry for what I did. I'm also sorry for being so selfish and telling you. I thought if I were honest, and told you, that it would be like when I go to confession and all is forgiven. But the reality is far from that.

I hope that you will forgive me, 'cause I know after getting over the hurts, I would try and forgive you. Scrub that, I wouldn't try, I just would. But I'm being selfish again, sorry. This isn't about me, this is about trying to repair the hurts thrown on you.

If it is any explanation, I was feeling down and lost, and now I really want us to start over. To treat you metaphorically, if you were a boat, I smashed and broke your bow, and made your heart ache by doing the wrong thing, but also more than the wrong thing.

I'm so very, very sorry now.

We've had time to let the dust of this issue settle. We've been separated for too long. And that's kind of how I let a stranger in.

How many times can I write and show you how sorry I am? You'll let me know, and know, and know, and know and hopefully one day you will feel my real deepest apology.

I really feel like such a fool, tearing everything apart everything we had, leaving us both in pain and sorrow.

Losing you ever, now, wondering why, where will we be tomorrow? This feels like a typical song that I've heard so many times before.

I thought we would be forever more.

I used to not remember a time when I didn't have you in my life, my world, my being. And now, without you here, I'm aching even more wanting and needing you.

Do you remembering when, before you graduated? We were sitting in Miss Pilsbury's office, and you said that you wouldn't leave me?

Well, it wasn't totally intentional, but you did leave me. You left me physically, and not being able to contact you, you left me emotionally too.

This is taking a darker turn, but I need to write this and get it out in the open. May be that would have helped and then I wouldn't have grabbed for the comfort from another.

I needed you, and wanted and needed you. I was feeling such anguish, with you leaving me. Leaving me in pain and sorrow, but losing you now, ….. how can I fix this?

_Paiiiiin and sorrrowwww!_ {he writes those three words, and the next two lines in red ink.}

_Losing you now, how can I win, where will I be tomorrow._

_Forever more that's what we are, to be without each other, we'll be remembering when._

Yeah, those were the words straight from the song.

If there is ever a way that I can fix this, please let me know?

How can we go forward and make this a big horrible bump in our history pages.

I was in the choir room, with Finn and it hit me so hard.

You are and were my world.

If you haven't heard, I went back and visited Dalton. The place is the same, and the Warbler's welcomed me back as if I'd never left. They pushed a blazer on me and the next thing I knew, I was deep in the heart of a song with them.

I felt a moment of being a traitor, but … it was so good. They embraced me like I was a long lost brother. And it felt so right, like it was meant to be, like I was meant to be. To be with the Warbler's. I felt so special, like I used to, before you came and made me feel so different again.

They have a new leader, Hunter Clarington, he reminded me of why I left Dalton for McKinely, it was to be with you. And now, you're not here.

Finn tried to persuade me to stay with New Directions, and that I belonged with them. But honestly, …. I need to be honest with myself.

Everything in that choir room, reminded me of you. You and I were a dynamic duo, together there.

Kurt, you were my anchor, you helped me be grounded. And now that you're gone, I feel like I've been floating. Floating around lost, eventually I'll float away and have no focus or purpose of who I am.

So I need to rap this up, it's long and if you've got this far, I suggest you sit down and brace yourself.

_Kurt turns over the page of a mini-book from Blaine. He's been sitting the whole time, but now with very worried eyes he bites his pinky as he continues reading. Rachel sits beside him, worried about her friend, knowing what has been happening back in Lima, but not having the bravery or feeling the right time has come, to tell him. Adam sits on a separate chair on the other side of him, oblivious of what he's reading, looking passed him to the television._

I have left McKinley and returned to Dalton.

The gang of my friends and others from New Directions gave me a wonderful parting party. By the time you get this, I'll have re-enrolled at Dalton and should be in my second week of studies.

I love you so much, but I couldn't study at McKinley anymore.

As you know Dalton has a boarding section, so I've asked my parents to let me board. They've said yes and so that's where you'll find me, if you ever need me or want me again.

In so many ways Dalton is the same as when you were there. But the huge hedge out front of the grounds has gone, an arsonist saw to that and ….

"_Kurt are you crying?" Adam asks, at hearing him sniffle._

"_No, it's just my contacts are annoying me." Kurt lies._

_~ a blue florescent light bulb flickers ~_

Blaine closes his study books, grabs his toiletries and makes his way to the common bath room.

It's passed lights out time, and if he gets caught out he couldn't care less. He turns on the hot tap and enters the cubicle.

As the scalding water hits his back, he counts five seconds passed his pain thresh hold from the last shower.

He sings quietly, "Never knew I could feel like this." He counts again and adds five more seconds. "Like I never felt before."

He looks at the cold tap, his hand making it's own decision to reach for it, begging it's owner to be allowed to find relief for the temperature being experienced elsewhere.

"Want to vanish inside your kiss." Permission given to take a kiss from Kurt, and permission no longer sought to turn the tap on, his eyelids flicker.

The scalding water starts to change to warm. "Seasons may change, winter to spring." Leaning forward to the shower wall, he hits a fist at it. "I love you."

_~ a blue florescent light bulb flickers ~_

_Days after reading the mini-book from Blaine, Kurt puts pen to paper._

_Dear Blaine,_

_I love you, until the end of time. … come what may …_

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_**extra notes from a kute author: this is what I think really, should have happened, he should have gone back to Dalton, and kept his self respect intact. 'cause … yeah just 'cause.**_


End file.
